So I got hospitalized on the 3rd day of frosh week. First thing right after my don told everyone to play safe, no less.
I jumped off the top of an inflatable maze and dislocated my shoulder in a race. Despite that, I won the race by an enormous margin. The first responders called it the "Thunderforce" in the cause of injury section of their report. The paramedics were puzzled.
It turns out life is not like Trauma Center, because I'm pretty sure I could've beaten the game in the time I spent in the waiting room.
Nurse: So tell me how this happened.
Me: It's a stupid story.
Nurse: It's frosh week, we're used to stupid stories.
Whatever they injected to put me asleep is like a miracle drug though. I was out and awake without ever knowing it and just found my arm fixed magically, didn't even skip a beat in my thoughts. I'm sure it would fetch a high price on the secondary market, AKA drug dealers.
I am now known as the "guy who supermanned off the slide".
Better yet, sometimes people ask me if I was the guy injured during ultimate frisbee. To which I can truthfully respond, "no, he was in the stretcher in front of me".
No comments:
Post a Comment